Breaking Good

admin | October 15th, 2019 - 4:56 am

If it ain’t broke, break it, then sell it, then fix it, then sell it again. There are endless phrases that one could attribute to expensive solutions looking for problems.  But when a company wilfully creates a problem to promote a solution that is not selling as well as anticipated and moreover, employs it to discredit a previous […]

The Little Card that Could

admin | May 4th, 2019 - 3:34 am

Any thrifty consumer worth their weight in loose change will be familiar with “the smart purchase”.  The term does not relate to donning a tailored tuxedo before venturing into a local branch of somewhere that has survived the tsunami of online retail and flourishing a fashionable wallet crammed with non-cypto currency in front of an eager proprietor.  That […]

Pointlessly Portless

admin | November 25th, 2018 - 5:54 am

If there’s one thing which vexes me more than struggling for innovative methods to retrospectively portray the present tense, it’s excuses.  Not any excuse you understand, not the sort of innocent reason one might give to graciously extract themselves from a toilsome social obligations; be they weddings, dinner parties, school reunions, having to host the sort of “friend” who […]

Turing the Scenery!

admin | September 16th, 2018 - 9:28 pm

A cryptic pun alluding to a renowned English scientist and a rewarding means by which to frequent and assimilate one’s surroundings. What better way to welcome technology conceived to conjure luminous dawns across emerald seas, glowing sunsets over ruby cities or pearl peppered mountains stretching into star spangled skies, and all without the hassle of hauling around the three cameras you insisted were necessary to capture such […]

Molten Macbook

admin | August 9th, 2018 - 11:50 pm

But it’s my pride and joy, my essence of being. It performs every duty I desire with infallible dedication. I cannot dispense with a tool that has grown closer to my heart, figuratively, than my grandfather’s century old hand-drill or the flagship Swiss army knife my mother bought me as a consolation gift when we discovered I […]

App-lex Predator.

admin | June 15th, 2018 - 4:44 am

No matter how intense the debate amongst self-proclaimed arm chair naturalists as to which apex predator would triumph in the event of a dispute over territory, food or disruptively loud roaring, the “brutal” truth is that such encounters are generally avoided by the animal kingdom’s hardest hitters because neither party would likely escape with a full set of […]

Oads & Sonics

admin | March 12th, 2018 - 6:07 am

The post millennial computational arms race precipitated comprehensive controversy in a multitude of manifestations. None was more significant than the teeming generation of egotistical cyber socialites famous for their ability to talk in ever decreasing fragments of sentences without really listening to a single word each other was saying, because everybody else was quite obviously […]

Minimised to the Macs!

admin | January 10th, 2018 - 5:43 am

Minimised to the Macs “Oh! What a machine.” “The pros really seem to like it.” “It’s not up-gradable.” “Uh.  The ram is but you have to take it to a service centre in order for them to do it for you.” The above four statements were uttered by two prolific and venerable technology journalists during the […]

Notch Your Normal iPhone.

admin | November 18th, 2017 - 3:57 am

In the context of ancient Marriage “Honeymoon” is a period newlyweds spend in idyllic isolation from their friends and families and in most cases, away from their native lands.  The idea is predicated on the location and surroundings providing the perfect backdrop for each spouse to appreciate the physical characteristics, personality traits, unique habits and […]

Redbeard vs the World

admin | September 13th, 2017 - 12:25 pm

Why? Why do so many still despise me.” A rueful red bearded giant reflected, sequestered in his cave of crimson silicon. “Who are there those that continue to doubt my abilities, denounce my efforts, express such disdain or even indifference for the herculean task I have,thus far, undertaken with nothing save for supreme skill, profound courage, […]

Chips That Pass in the Night.

admin | July 18th, 2017 - 6:36 am

So, what do you think of Force Majeur?!  An excited long-term acquaintance asked me following the first sip of his third double espresso. “Pardon?” I responded, glancing up casually from a gorilla glass screen strewn with alerts emoji’s and angry fingerprints. “Force Majeur”  My colleague repeated.  “The new smash hit legal drama series on  Purgostream?” I set my small […]

More “Passive” Pixels.

admin | August 10th, 2016 - 1:40 pm

There is a popular saying that I first chanced to hear during the opening story of a highly regarded British portmanteau horror film entitled “The House That Dripped Blood”. The story concerned a struggling author attempting to compose his latest masterpiece about an escaped homicidal maniac who prowled the countryside for hapless prey that he […]

Professional Padding.

admin | September 28th, 2015 - 10:07 am

At the ripe old age of 8 I could never understand why or how any animal vegetable or mineral could fail to become spellbound by an intoxicating atmosphere that pervaded the ozone rich air of a sleepy coastal town and danced a frosty tango with winter’s cold sigh once in every 365 blue moons. That’s […]